“There is a flower within my heart, Daisy, Daisy.” –Harry Dacre
“There is a flower within my heart, Hailey Baby.” – Jeff Brown
Hailey, Baby, give me your answer, do,
I’m half crazy, all for the love of you.
My 17-month old granddaughter, Hailey, shoved a plastic spoon laden with imaginary food (I liked to think it was a scrumptious bite of lasagna, but I suspect it was strained peas) in my mouth. “Yum, num, num.” I said, smacking my lips loudly.
“Hee, hee,” she exclaimed.
Then it was my turn to feed her. I took another plastic spoon, scooped up some imaginary Hamburger Helper, and pretended to feed it to her. “Over the lips, past the gums, look out tummy, here it comes!”
She bit the spoon. “Mmmmm.” Then she smacked her lips. “Apple?”
“Yes,” I said. It’s certainly not Hamburger Helper; it’s 100% pure organic applesauce.”
“Mmmmm.”
I was on my knees and we were playing with a toy kitchenette, complete with plastic plates, plastic pots and pans, plastic fruits and vegetables, and yes, a tiny cardboard box of Hamburger Helper. (Cheeseburger Macaroni, if I remember right.) She grabbed a plastic French fry and shoved it down a tiny plastic ketchup bottle. Her eyes got real big. “Uh oh.”
“Oh no!” I exclaimed. “What are we going to do now?” She handed it to me. “Okay,” I said, “I’ll try to get it out.”
It won’t be a lunch that tastes fantastic-
Because it’s made of plastic,
The yellow crinkly fry was really stuck in there, and my fingers were way too big to fit down the neck of the pretend bottle, so I turned it upside down and shook it. The fry popped out just enough for me to grab with my fingertips. I pulled it out. “Here you go, Hailey Baby,” I said, as I gave her back the wayward fry and bottle.
She smiled at me appreciatively, which made me feel like I was king of the world. Then she shoved the fry back inside. “Uh oh!”
Soon we were filling a picnic basket. “Here’s a nice plastic hardboiled egg,” I said. We had our basket packed with other nutritious plastic items too like plastic hamburgers, plastic hotdogs, and about a dozen or so plastic potato chips.
Interesting fact: Junk food, even in plastic form, is still more attractive and tasty than the healthier plastic alternatives.
I noticed some of the fruits and vegetables were cut in half. Well, they weren’t actually cut; rather they were vacuum formed in halves with Velcro taped to the side them.
Another interesting fact: Most children won’t eat the Velcro, although that’s where all the vitamins are.
The Velcro gave me an idea. I found two plastic onion halves and Velcroed them together. Then I found a plastic butter knife. “Check this out, Hailey.” On the floor, I cut it in half with the knife. The ripping sound the Velcro made was surprisingly realistic and I handed the knife over to her. “Now it’s your turn.”
I put the onion back together and held it steady. With her diaper sticking out of the top of her blue jeans, Hailey hunched over the plastic vegetable. She pushed and pushed with both hands and the Velcro went rip, rip, until she cut it all the way through.
“Yay, Hailey,” I exclaimed, “You did it!”
She raised her arms in victory. “Yay!”
Then I gave her a hug.
FYI: I don’t normally teach babies how to use knives, but in this particular instance, it seemed perfectly appropriate.
Besides, I was really craving some freshly sliced plastic onion for my plastic hamburger.
But you’d look sweet, right next to me
On a pretend picnic packed for two!